mr. right

One of the oddest parts about choosing a donor is that we can be so picky. We were reading through eliminating those without a certain eye color, ancestry, etc. Once we ordered more information, we got to see tons of medical information...generations of medical information. It did make a difference to me. However, if we were in the donor's places, I am sure we would be rejected. Both of us have family medical histories that are less than perfect. My feeling is that since we do get to choose, I'm going to choose the best I can. As E said, we looked for someone who is like me. While no guarantees exist about how a baby will turn out, we would like to increase the odds that our child will resemble both of us.

The donor we finally chose is quite a bit like me. At least the things I think are important...educated, witty, and physically similar. We did not set out to choose an open donor and didn't realize we had until we had pretty much finalized our choice. I am glad that we did. I like the idea that our child could contact his biological father at some point in the future...expand his/her family, have more knowledge about family history.

Once I checked prices, I realized that open donor sperm costs more. We freaked out for a little while but then settled ourselves. We have many opportunities to earn extra money besides what we're already saving, and we both want a baby. It's that simple. I think we'd both work very hard to make it happen. For a while, we will be spending money like crazy...buying the sperm, paying for a lawyer, the cost of the inseminations...but it will be completely worth it. A family.

m